All posts tagged: #how

“It’s Cold”

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This the second day my kids’ school was cancelled because it is -25º with the windchill here in Illinois.  It hurts to go outside.  Houses and cars are frozen and refusing to work.  We’ve all got cabin fever.  I need groceries.  The washing machine broke.  Not super smiley today. Whenever something feels too intense (i.e. I hate it), I’m trying to get perspective and consider what Compassion could look like in it.  It’s a mental and spiritual discipline that gently erodes my entitlement and ungratefulness. As you deal with extreme weather you could consider these compassionate responses: 1. Cold & Homeless:  The average age of a homeless person in DuPage County (my affluent county) is EIGHT years old. Most of the homeless here are together in families, not the toothless, mentally unstable, unshaven loners many of us think of.  They are staying in crowded shelters and/or living in their cars during this extreme weather.  Some families are homeless because it is better to be homeless that to stay with their abusive spouse/provider.  Think about that.  We …

Vote Today!

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Happy New Year! Today is the day our family chooses our Family Compassion Focus.  We brainstormed a week ago.  Had the list up on the fridge since then.  And today we will vote. There is no exact science to this.  It should be fun.  I hope it feels special.  Here is how Team Fritz does it. 1.  We order Chinese Food for dinner.  Long ago my parents took authentic Chinese cooking classes and organized elaborate progressive dinners for a big neighborhood Chinese New Year’s Parties (some time between mid-January and February).  Since then I always crave Chinese food on any day celebrating a “New Year.”  Take out is great because we’re normally pretty tired after being up so late.  And asian food is ideal for my sad gluten-free requirements. The goal is to have a fun meal that everyone will enjoy.  A private, special dinner party for the people in your home.  What food will cause the least amount of fussing?  Is it better to go out to eat?  Would you prefer to cook a …

Obstacles

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Have you and your family had a Family Compassion Focus brainstorming time yet?  If you haven’t it is okay.  I understand.  There are so many obstacles to starting something new. No Time – when are we all going to be together today? will you be here when the kids get up from naps?  i have so much to do!  when will you be home from your friend’s house?  is that work calling again?  will we even have time to add something like a Compassion Focus into our lives? Crazy Life – the sewer is backed up!  i have the flu!  the kids are fighting!  are you taking her to the orthodontist?  should I buy those tickets now? Big Fear – what if no one wants to try this? what does that say about our family? what does that say about me?  what if we can’t agree?  what are we getting ourselves into?  can we afford it?  i bet we won’t do it anyway. Old Habits – we don’t normally eat around a table, my kids always fight at …

Now is the Time

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Real Life Tips for Your 1st Family Compassion Focus Chat Christmas is over.  You did it!   Gifts were given.  Kids have new stuff.  Sweets were eaten. Family drama is (hopefully) over for now.   School and extra-curiculars are not for another week.   Christmas Vacation for real. More joy +  Less commitments = Softer heart.  When my heart is softer my perspective is better.  I’m more grateful and hopeful.  Things seems less impossible.  Compassion comes more easily. I hope you are thinking about having a Family Compassion Focus in 2015.  Here are some ideas to get started **this week.**

Getting Started – Two-Page Plan for your own Family Compassion Focus

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You might like the sound of “Being More Compassionate” and your kids becoming “World Changers.”  But maybe it just seems like big fuzzy happy talk, not practical or helpful.   That’s not my scene.  I hate sunny, hollow promises.  I love implementing big ideas, giving lots of tips, and using lots of metaphors.  That is why this little blog is here, to be practical and encouraging as you and your family journey toward Compassion together.   After our first year of having a Family Compassion Focus, I didn’t have anything tangible for people who said, “I want to do this, but I don’t know how.”  So I made this very simple 2 page table (below) with suggestions for what you and your whole family can think about and do each month to love and serve others intentionally. I’d love to hear how you plan to use this, and learn from your family’s Compassion Experiments. Let me know in the comments if you have questions or ideas.  And please, let me tell your worried heart — if my family, with …